There are many types of abuse, and each one has a different impact on every individual. The thing about abuse is that it unimaginably changes people. Many people happen to be unaware of how abuse transforms people and affects their relationships due to a lack of awareness.
To help you navigate your way with an abuse survivor, we have gathered six ways that will let you know how abuse survivors love you differently. If this article is helpful to you, then kindly share and educate people further on this matter.
Having A Hard Time Opening Up
A person can go through various kinds of abuse, but whatever abuse they go through definitely impacts them. The trauma caused over a prolonged period is challenging to heal from, and time is certainly required. Although there are many side effects of trauma, difficulty opening up to people is positioned at the top of the list.
Opening up to someone about your particular emotions, feelings, and love makes an abuse survivor feel vulnerable. They become extremely protective of their energy and the time they give to people due to their past experiences. Giving someone the power to hurt them again makes them feel fragile as they are still humans. Moreover, the process of recovering through pain is the worst thing any person has to go through.
Hence, if you know someone who was once a victim of abuse, know that you should always be kind and patient with them. If they open up to you, this means that they trust you. They will take their time and see if you are worth it, but if they do trust you, never betray them.
Extremely Suspicious
It’s often said that abuse ruins people. The aforementioned statement happens to be quite true as people who are victims often feel as if they are useless, worthless, trash, and so much more. Their entire personality is destroyed. They have a habit of over-thinking and questioning themselves as to why it happened to them, which is normally what survivors do.
When they find a person who shows them kindness, they are supportive, loving, and caring; they don’t accept it as true. They are suspicious of kindness any human might show them seeing how they mentally believe they don’t deserve it. They most probably have abandonment issues as everyone has left them when they have found a new person.
It is quite normal when you don’t understand why someone loves you, but in case of an abuse survivor, you should assure them that you have never-ending feelings towards them and will never let them go. It will prove extremely beneficial in your relationship.
Affectionate When They Want To Be
Being affectionate in a relationship is quite familiar. However, if a person has suffered from sexual abuse, then getting affection from them can be quite daunting. They see their abuser in anyone who tries to get close to them, which is fair from their perspective.
If you are having difficulty continuing the relationship, it might help if you put yourself in your abused partners’ shoes. You will see how little love they got and the abuse they suffered through, which will help you understand why they behave this certain way.
The best thing you can do at this point is to give them time and not force them into doing anything that might trigger memories they have fought so hard to keep buried. You should always be patient and take whatever affection they allow to give you until they are fully ready.
An Extremist
It is quite normal for individuals who are abused to build walls around themselves to protect themselves from future heartbreak. Each wall is added as a layer when any heartbreak happens. So, when another individual enters their life and starts showering them with love, they become wary and protective of themselves.
They want to reciprocate the love they receive badly, but they cannot do so due to their previous trauma. There is always a voice on the back of their minds that tells them that one day this person will leave, and it’s going to hurt on an extreme level.
Their trauma has caused them to become extremists, and they jump to conclusions on every single occasion. If you have identified the symptoms mentioned earlier in the individual you are in a relationship with, kindly show them that they are protected and loved. Tell them that you are here to stay and won’t leave them no matter what.
Being Distant And Having Trust Issues
If you are in a relationship with a person who has faced abuse, you probably know that no matter how much you support them, there will always be days or occasions when they will be distant from you.
You might be able to sense their distantness by simply observing how they don’t reply immediately to your texts, not picking your calls, and not showing affection at times. Trusting is a trait that comes hard to them, but it doesn’t mean that they have no trust in you. It simply means that you need to take things slow and wait for them to come around, which they indeed will as all good things take time.
Getting Attached Too Fast
A person who has been verbally abused never believes when anyone says something good about them. They have been conditioned to think negatively, seeing how they were reminded so often of their incapability to find love, worthless, and so much more than they believe it more than anything.
Therefore when the abusive person is replaced by a loving human and proves how they deserve all the love in the world, they get attached amazingly fast to this person. They might come off as clingy and freak you out, but the best way to deal with this is through communication and mutual understanding.
To sum it all up, if your partner is going through depression, then visit kootenaybotanicals.com as they have fantastic products that can help cure depression but make sure to consult your doctor before consuming anything. Try your best to be there for your partner and help them overcome their fears by communicating all that bothers them and you. For all you know, you can be the reason for them returning to a healthy life.
